I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
party gras won. party gras always wins.
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
Back of his car in the Starbucks parking lot WITH HIS APRON STILL ON. Check and Mate.
Holy shit. You won barista bingo AND the Triple Crown in one day.
Can you please venmo me emergency money? i have no pants.
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
Randomize
