So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
Sometimes he's such a bitch I forget that he's not actually a girl. Last night I asked him if I could borrow a tampon.
He had some in his pocket. That was weird.
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I bought beer tonight and got 3 coupons with my receipt. Paper towels, laundry detergent, and Advil. I wonder if Stop & Shop predicts the future or just does this with every beer purchase.
the girl i fucked last night woke up this morning, disoriented and looked at me, and said "oh, you're hot." and went back to sleep.
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
He passed out mid-signature
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
Hooked up with an ex Playgirl model. I feel like the universe just high-fived me for staying sober.
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
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