Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
Xanax and allergy medicine look a lot alike when you spill them on the floor. Just saying that I still have allergies but I'm unsure if I still have legs
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
Randomize
