Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
I'll write directions out on a napkin and slip it to him. Then say P.S. The UTI is gone.... that's not creepy at all right?
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
She just opened a six pack of corona with her car door ... I had no idea she was such a skilled drunk
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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