I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
You were my sober police. You had one job and you failed miserably.
I'm a corrupt cop.
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
Randomize
