we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
A woman in the waiting room at the STD clinic told me that she is going to pray to jesus for my penis.
and people in Baltimore still get a bad wrap.
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
Randomize
