If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
Hey. Hey you. Just wanted to let you know that I'm adorable. FUCKING ADORABLE. That is all. This update brought to you by our proud sponsor bud light.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
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