so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
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Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
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