google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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