Another night of drunkeness. Maybe I shouldn't have played death pong...
Didn't you just get a DUI last week?
Indeed I did but death didn't stop Jesus now did it
i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
You called me at 4am shouting drunk shit about Poland and asking me to 'come out and play.' Where the fuck were you?
Poland
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
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