You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
i think a pirate just stole the rest of our fucking beer. what an appropriate costume.
i don't want a singing card. it disturbs my hangover. give me a pack of cigs taped to a bottle of wine and fuck me without a condom. happy vday baby.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
My mind's like "He's a sexist pig" but my uterus is like "YOU SHALL BEAR HIM STRONG CHILDREN"
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
Randomize
