I've been at work for less than an hour and have pooped twice already. That's what happens when you start sleeping with your roommate and don't want to use the bathroom at home anymore.
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
I went outside for a smoke at 4 and things seemed normal. It's 6 now and the front lawn is COVERED in tortilla chips. WTF?
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
Welp, just took a tab of acid and cracked one of three bottles of champagne... Mondays ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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