is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
Just had an oven catch fire while I was balls deep. Fire department came, I did not.
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
Randomize
