It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
You paid the taxi driver with a comb last night.
I'm sorry I kept calling last night when you wouldn't pick up. I'm REALLY sorry I sang "You Oughta Know" on more than 4 voice mails.
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
Lmfao a voicemail screaming about you partying with your tits out and a text at 3 am saying you went too crazy... this should be a good one
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
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