you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
i probably shouldve stopped when i uncurled the curly straw in my cocktail because it was slowing me down
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
Not as great as when your drunk mom grabbed my junk, but better than when your sober grandma sacktapped me and grabbed my butt.
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
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