Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
I woke up with a russian doll attached to my necklace and a post-it note with "keep babushka safe" written on it. Fuck vodka
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
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