Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
so I was like, you know platform 9 3/4? I know something else with those measurements. best. pick up line. ever.
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
These tits shall not be calmed
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
Randomize