Banned from zoo.
Again?
ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
so this maintenance guy stood at the corner of my cubical and scratched his balls for like a full minute cause he thought no one could see him
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
Randomize
