Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They all laughed at me when I bought that necklace from Life Alert. Who's laughing now?
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
I just licked a piece of cheese off my phone screen if that makes you feel any better
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
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