Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
You told her to step on the scale because you had whiskey goggles, and scales don't lie.
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
My mom just drunk texted me complaining about her genitals smelling like Taco Bell. I really am her son
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize
