after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
I just stole a conducting baton from the chicago symphony orchestra... i have to stop drinking on weeknights
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
woke up, covered in gummy bears, with a note that said "the gummy army won"
Randomize
