Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
I'm using the Malibu pitcher you stole from the bar to make pancakes this morning. It's actually working really well.
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Randomize
