I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
they're like a gay fantastic four
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
Randomize
