Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
if you made me into a cookie and threw me into a betty crocker easy bake oven on christmas morning...that's how baked i am
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
He started screaming "fuck me I'm Ryan Gosling" and proceeded to pick up the smallest guy at the party and carry him to bed.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
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