your room smells of hookers.
And success
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
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I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
Um...It has come to my attention that I may have said some rather vulgar things about Sean Connery to you and anyone listening last night, so...I apologize for that. I meant the things I said. But still. Sorry.
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
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The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
I just went on etsy and my personalized suggestions on the page were either kinky sex restraints or baby things. I feel like etsy just summarized my life.
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
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