If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
There are parrots here and they're headbanging to the music. There's also a clown and a pit bull that can jump onto tables. Too high for this shit.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
Randomize
