I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
No I am not eating basil off your cock
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
so... the fat chick just walked over, shook my hand, then introduced herself as "versatile". shoot me now.
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
My fire has petered out without you
My Peter has fired out without you
That might be the most romantic thing you’ve said to me, unfortunately.
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
Randomize
