Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
her roommate was in the bathroom for over an hour so i volunteered to take the dog out and i shit in the bushes
I really hope I'm not the first person who's had to wash vomit off of cash and credit cards.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
Randomize