I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
I called the bar to ask if they found my Id and credit card and they remembered me as 'the girl who signed her receipt in blood'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
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