the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
While in Europe, he bought me a pouring tap to put on my liquor so I don't spill. This means 2 things.1) He really loves me. 2) I'm a noticeable alcoholic.
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
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