Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
Randomize
