He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
What's the rule on cocaine before dinner?
Its 11 o'clock somewhere
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
Randomize
