hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're the only guy I know who could convince a lady at the pharmacy to trade you her pain pills for your antibiotics.
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
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