id be glad to
one two three fourrrrnication!
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
I've decided if you aren't here in fifteen minutes I'm leaving you for Mario the 75 year old Colombian bartender.
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
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