Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job.
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
Perhaps if I didn't mortify my parents last night with my drunken obnoxious behavior which resulted in the casualty of an entire decorative bathroom shelf which I completely ripped off the wall and left for dead, I would be more than willing to go day drinking.
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
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