you would pick up someone in the library
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
In light of your oncoming completion of twenty-three years of personhood, I feel a pressing need to blast country-pop phenomenon Taylor Swift's hit single "22" in your general direction until midnight.
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
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