I think drunk me is telling hungover me something... I just have to crack the code.
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
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