I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
Dude I got in an Uber this morning and he goes “I drove you last night”\n“You got your dick sucked in the back seat”
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
Randomize