I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
Randomize