Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
So bottomless mimosas = me waking up in a truck bed in a random neighborhood with no purse or phone or idea how I got there.
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize