Rock
Scissors
Fuck
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
I just woke up and checked my e-mail, and apparently while drunk I bought a blowtorch. Thought you'd want to know.
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
God doesn't care if you're a paramedic, you can't do that to someones cat and still get into heaven
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
Randomize
