I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
Also I just sneezed literally 12 times in a row so violently...boogers everywhere. Sorry to ruin the sexting. I just felt like you had to know
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
Randomize
