Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
