grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
Her cat was breathing in my ear all night, like that kid from Hey Arnold.
Well when I woke up this morning I didn’t think I’d be masturbating to my own LinkedIn profile today but here we are
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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