Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
I look like Roseanne just got in a bar fight with Rosie O'Donnell.
As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
Randomize
