I woke up this morning with I hate myself feeling
I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
Tumblr User Tells Story About A ‘Demon Gets Adopted By A Grandma’& It Needs To Be A F**king Movie
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
Also, I'm sewing my entire Halloween costume by hand. I better get laid at every single party I go to.
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
20+ Kids Who Probably Didn’t Mean To Draw Hardcore Porn
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.