Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
I just got hit in the face by an old lady love handle.
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
The girl beside me at the laundromat is bitching a guy out on the phone for jizzing on her bedspread. She had to use a triple machine to wash it.
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
Randomize
