I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to fuck your dad last night but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn't drink tequila.
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
Randomize
