jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
BEST FEELING EVER: Standing in a hot fucking shower, while super baked, while eating a cookie.
You eat cookies in the shower?
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize
