don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
Oh fuck, I messaged a Jack Kerouac poem to a girl I'm trying to sleep with last night at 4am.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
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