Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
WHY WOULD YOU LET ME MAKE THAT MUCH NOISE DURING SEX IN RESIDENCE ?!
I tried to push your face into the pillow but then you kicked like a donkey.
I love tequila.
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
We're listening to the crystal method and doing bong hits for jesus
How are you texting me from 1998?
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
My mom just told me I look like darth vader. how's your night?
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