I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
Nooo, I ran into two if my exes, both having their engagement parties at the bar. It was like a fucking Eskimo family reunion, but with more tequila.
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
Randomize